I wander down the path of the unknown, unsure of how to make sense of any of it. My insides ache from unfilled wonders that leave my mind with empty holes. With each step I wonder where my feet will fall. There are always new beginnings in times of unrest, places we can go inside to investigate our pain, to understand ourselves better.

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Trepidation fills my heart with emptiness, while the vast unknown carries the seeds to heal. It’s hard to reach, to touch what the heart needs sometimes. Empty corners of my inner world wreak a havoc that reflects an inner learning that only reaches me through sorrow. It doesn’t always make sense, I suppose that is the troubling part for me, and hence another part of my inner world I need to understand. How can I trust what I see and feel? This recognition of this other world within me, within the trees? Is it real? Does it even matter?

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I climb down inside of myself to understand the truth. Silence holds me still with untold stories that remain hidden. Not knowing leaves me trepid, unable to move, to navigate. Mystery befalls us, as this unrecognizable truth that pushes me to reveal this place that remains unspoken. It’s a lost feeling that is hard to capture, other then the realization that I am left to its mercy, unable to understand what is real anymore.

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There I was, lost in the clouds, this mist within, and then it came, a faint image of the truth. It gave me something to reach for, something that was different, that had no comparison to my waking life. The clouds cleared away and I was left with an empty stairwell that led further down inside of me. At the other end was a blank TV screen with its normal black and white image that TV’s have when there is no station connected. Behind the static I could hear the sound of another message trying to get through, as if from another world in an effort to reveal what is real to me. 

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We all carry bits and pieces of a process that makes little sense. For me, it was this conflict within, one created by myself for me to solve. Just one angle of the many mysteries we carry on the inside. This is the work of our lifetime and each lesson learned is one piece of the mystery of reality we carry, out of which comes our greater evolution. My journey inwards has always revealed something important, something unspoken of, an answer that has always held logic as a downfall of the mind that finds itself tricked by the experience of its own separation with reality. 

That is the hard part, revealing what is true to oneself. We all get to participate in our own play, the mystery lies in discovering the story is that is being told through you, the truth behind the curtain that you are supposed to reveal. That inner journey has helped me realize the mystery I carry is only one I can reveal to myself, that it is not a simple answer  but rather it is one that requires me to see things in the way they are, to go through uncomfortable places inside of me, and to surrender to the reality that lies within.